And when you leave I’ll smell like you…
Walk like, talk like, even think like you.
The only thing I know is,
is that I can never be myself anymore.
You helped them mold me into a puppet…
Made me dance on strings and sing like I’m Kermit.
What is mine belongs to you;
my heart, my soul and my body too.
You raise me up on a pedestal in the company of other criminals like yourself.
I can’t help but love the attention.
Though my innocence slips away piece by piece with every stare,
my conscience reminds me that the guilt is proof that I still care.
You aided them in stripping me of my flesh and replacing it with plastic
so whenever you want, or they want, I could be modeled into anyone’s definition of perfect.
But I can’t save myself.
I’ve too long now grown accustomed to the humiliation I suffer in silence.
And now my waning conscience just like my self-respect,
thinks so little of me, yet I don’t object.
They are right to judge.
Sometimes I want to change…
Sometimes I even try.
However, reality creeps up on me in the wee hours of the night.
It gives me a fright.
Weakened with fear so I can’t even fight.
The knowledge of my circumstances still begs me to cry.
Because I listen, I’m forced to comply.
Written: Fri. 4th August, 2017